Growing Up Adopted, Thoughts And Expectations

Growing up adopted can be very...nerve-racking to say the least. I am sure it is a different experience for every child. In my case, I think it might have actually been slightly traumatic for me, if that makes any sense at all. If not, I will try my best to make it make sense.

Before I was adopted, I went through several foster homes; and even managed to slip a group home in there every once in a while. When I say several, I mean seventeen. This was from between the ages of two and ten years old, well, actually, nine and a half years old.

So, when I finally found my dream parents; unbeknownst to me, of course, I was at first gushing with exitement. I remember even getting in trouble in the foster home I was in at the time for bragging to one of the other kids that I had finally found a family that wanted me...and they hadn't. When I first met my parents, I had just looked at them matter of factly, and just said, "C'mon Mom and Dad." I just knew, that....or I knew that they would my next set of parents; I had so many of them. Who knows what goes through the mind of a child, especially one with a very confusing background.

Well, those parents adopted me. I was overjoyed for about two years. Then I became, stir-crazy, maybe? It was time for them to send me on my way. I don't think I actually realized that a home could or would be permanant. I started acting up. I got tired of listening to my "Dad" read stories to his daughter everynight...the daughter that was actually his. No one ever did that with me. I got tired of being the oddball in the family, once again. Not having any resemblence to any of the others. When I did poorly in school, it was not because of my effort that I had NOT made, it was because they didn't have me. I wasn't blood related. They were all lawyers, and smart, and all in the military. Me...I was artistic, quiet, shy, stuck in the background unless I was in a play. That didn't count either, because I wasn't being myself.

There were a lot of downfalls. Not always, thought. Sometimes those downfalls were good, depending on how you looked at it. I could memorize the first act of Hamlet in an hour. Then go the next day and recite it to a group of people. I was not athletic, in sports, but I could tap dance the night away. I could read REALLY fast. I read a book a day. I did not look like anyone in my family, but I had beautiful auburn hair and freckles that everyone gushed over. I didn't do well in school, not as well as I should have, but I was concentrating my excelling in my arts classes; and a literary magazine, and putting on coffee houses to read my poetry at.

My parents, when I was adopted, were as supportive of me as I could imagine any parent would be of their own children. So, all in all, I had a very good experience with my adoption. I can unfortunately, not say what to expect after adoption. Every family is different, every person in different. We all have different experiences with every aspect of life.

I can tell you however. Make the most of it. Don't make any part of your life a burden, even before the adoption. Make it part of who you are, it is what makes you strong. Your past, and all the hardships that came with it, is what is going to help you get through all of the hardships in the present, and the future. A lot of people think after you are adopted, it's easy from there. All your prayers are answered. It's not true. You still have to work for happiness, and you still have to deal with life. Life is never easy, not even for those of us with all of the money in the world.

Good luck to all of us; adopted, fostercare, orphans, homeless, billionares...we all need it.